Permission To Rest

My opening line to this post is a memory of my Aunt saying.

REST.... when I die I Rest.

Why do we meet REST with such RESISTANCE?

It's really a very interesting thing to think about.

I've been observing how people react to the concept of rest for at least a decade. I never formulated any concrete thought about it. I was just observing, watching, listening and feeling into this fascinating phenomenon.

For years, I observed people in savasana (rest pose at the end of a yoga class) laying there with eyes WIDE open. The restlessness would kick in, eyes couldn't close, body couldn't be still. Basically, they couldn't wait for this part of class to be over.

I would inquire if they were ok. The answer I always got, was yes, I just can't relax.

Then I had a flashback to a moment where both Mukunda and Chinnamasta were telling me that I couldn't write my Ayurvedic Yoga Therapy paper until I was rested. I actually remember pleading with them because I wanted to submit it as soon as I could, but they refused to let me do it, until they felt I had enough rest.

Next, I remembered my first Ayurvedic detox in India, like 12 years ago. Every single day the doctor would take my pulse, check all the things and say, "OK, go to bed." He just kept sending me back to bed. 😂 Then after about 5 or 6 days he would say, "OK, go for a walk." He would give me specific times of day to walk and specific times of day to rest. As time went on, I was talking really nice walks in the forest and in town. Once I wrapped my head around it, I absolutely loved it.

So, this REST thing has been noodling in my brain for a long time.

I'm going to use my retreat weekends as an example, but it's just an example.

Think BIGGER picture...and I'll explain what I mean in a bit..so hang on.

As, you all know, I've been hosting weekend retreats for gosh, a really long time. The age old "Pickle" always comes down to the itinerary. For years, I watch groups come and get all tangled up in the itinerary of the weekend. I silently observed, accommodated and served as needed. The same question always remained with me.

"What are they actually getting out of this experience?

They would arrive tired and they would leave a different kind of tired.

What do I mean by this?

They were energized, happy, and fulfilled, but still rest deprived.

Make sense?

The uplifting vibes were and are great, and on some level, supporting rest, but not fully.

Group after group would come and we would do this dance of "Fitting it all in." Many times, I would hear, "We want it all!" As, I watched them peel themselves out of bed and onto their yoga mats, I would say to myself, "Is this the right thing to do?"

I've continually tweaked the itinerary to include all sorts of possible activities, but is MORE what we really need?

I sat with all of this and I realized I was having an internal ethical conflict.

So, I started giving everyone my "Elevator speech" about the itinerary and the flow of the weekend. I have complete faith and confidence in how these retreats go and when I say everything happens in it's own time and in it's own way, I fully trust that, because I've live that, but it's a difficult message for people to understand. I understand that too. So, I would tell everyone, I'm prepared for all of it, but if something shifts or isn't completed, it's ok. I would get blank stares sometimes.

So the next retreat weekend comes around and I deliver my "Elevator speech," and something totally UNEXPECTED happened.

They said OK!

I almost fell over.

Typically I'm met with subtle resistance.

The big thing sticking point can be, "We paid for this, so we want it all."

I hear that, respect that and honor that.

But the internal question, has always been, "Is this actually what is needed?"

This time, we didn't start Yoga at 9am, we lingered in our jammy's a bit. We did what was needed. What happened instead, was meaningful conversation was shared, the armor that we all carry, slowly started to soften, and everyone started to get tired.

Why?

Because nervous system recalibration started to happen.

I was watching the shift happen and holding space for all of it.

I kept encouraging REST and no one fought it.

YES!!!!

This was so exciting! For years, part of my "Elevator speech included"

MORE ISN'T BETTER

What I realized this is that they needed the PERMISSION TO REST!

My "Elevator speech" was a little different this time. I was LOVING, but firm in asking...WHAT DO WE REALLY NEED OUT OF THIS WEEKEND? NOT WANT, BUT NEED....

We are programmed to watch the clock the entire week,

WHY DO WE WANT TO DO THAT HERE?

I GIVE EVERYONE FULL PERMISSION TO LISTEN TO WHAT YOUR BODY NEEDS.

IF YOU NEED A NAP INSTEAD OF A YOGA CLASS...DO IT!

THIS RETREAT WILL SUPPORT AND NURTURE YOU IN ALL WAYS.

They embraced it and allowed the weekend to flow and unfold.

It was one of the most beautiful weekend Retreats!

Everyone Embraced REST.

So, what's all the REST RESISTANCE about?

It has so much to do with our programing from childhood.

We have to work hard.

We have to prove ourselves.

We have to be successful.

REST IS FOR WIMPS! REST IS FOR SISSIES! REST=LAZY!

This comes from this PRODUCTIVITY mentality that's instilled in us from birth.

Yes, of course we all want to be productive and feel good about it.

BUT...we also need to balance it out with REST.

Let's bring this back to the good old NERVOUS SYSTEM.

We are ALL wired for survival!

Unless the nervous system is trained to receive REST,

it will translate REST as DANGEROUS.

We have to make a conscious effort to allow REST, and by this I mean intentional healing REST, not NUMB OUT rest. They are 2 different things.

Intentional rest, will restore the body and mind on all levels.

Numb out rest will NOT. It will keep us "comfortable," so the nervous system isn't agitated. However, there are cases where NUMB OUT is absolutely needed.

It's just not always beneficial of staying in that space for long periods of time.

For some, it is the only way.

For a lot of us, we can come out of the "Numb out" and ease into intentional rest, over time. It is possible, but it takes patience and time for the nervous system to come out of

Survival mode.

One example of this NUMB OUT mode is, DOING DOING DOING!!

If we aren't DOING, we don't know what to do.

That's when the nervous system starts to freak out

NOT DOING IS NOT SAFE.

Resting feels wasteful, Quiet feels frightening. Silence can be torture.

So, what happens?

Most of us DO DO DO to AVOID AVOID AVOID

Until, the body hits the wall...and it always does...and ONLY THEN we feel that REST is justified.

But why do we have to run ourselves into the ground before we allow ourselves to REST? This is a really interesting this to ask ourselves. Why are we not worthy of rest?

The deeper I go into teaching, the more I ask myself these questions.

We can't make clear decisions unless we are rested.

We navigate life without proper rest. We simply can't.

But there are ways to soothe an overstimulated nervous system and lead it into a place where rest is welcomed.

We MUST really embrace our nervous system.

We have to take care of it!

It all starts there!

The nervous system responds really well to regularity.

Irregular anything will keep the nervous system ALWAYS on guard, and in survival mode.

THE 8 TYPES OF REST we need to regulate our nervous system:

1. PHYSICAL REST - This includes restful sleep, and gentle movement to help restore and relax the muscles and tissues. This is very soothing to the nervous system, and supports the immune system.

   
   

2. MENTAL REST - This includes taking breaks throughout the work day. Intentionally schedule time to unload the brain of worry and negative thoughts. Find activities that are easy on the brain like gardening, cooking, or listening to music.

   
   

3. SOCIAL REST - Give yourself permission to schedule less. Make choices to engage in uplifting and positive experiences. Have interactions where you can be yourself.

   
   

4. EMOTIONAL REST - Give yourself permission to pause from constant emotional demands. Allow yourself space to feel your feelings. Discover what your boundaries are and honor them. Release instead of suppress. RECOGNIZE SIGNS OF BURNOUT.

   
   

5. SPIRITUAL REST - Give yourself permission to reconnect with your purpose. Find peace through stillness, and simplicity.

   
   

6. SENSORY REST - Give yourself permission to UNPLUG. To put yourself on

   DO NOT DISTURB. Reduce overwhelming sensory input.

   
   

7. CREATIVE REST - Give yourself permission to create something for the fun of it! Read a book for fun. Go on a nature adventure. Explore your creative side.

   
   

8. SEASONAL REST - This is a real phenomenon. Our energy changes with each season and we need to REST in order to REGULATE.

AYURVEDA, YOGA, & TANTRA talk about the importance of REST.

REST is ALWAYS part of our healing journey.

REST FOR REVIVAL

REST FOR REGULATION

REST FOR RECOVERY

~ Leelah Lakshmi ~

Animals know how to rest. Nature knows how to rest. We are not different from animals or nature.